The Hopeful Exiled Misfit

The Hopeful Exiled Misfit

When I was searching for a title for my blog I had great difficulty trying to come up with something that conveyed the things I wanted. I was raised by Christian parents and have been a Christian myself for all of my life. I married a very Godly Christian woman who is unrivaled in her spirituality and devotion to God. My two boys were raised as Christians and both now are seeking full time ministry just not in a traditional setting but rather they are seeking to utilize their gifts and talents to further the kingdom through the medium of television and film. I have even served in many capacities for many different churches. I have served as a deacon and youth ministry leader. I have served as a bible class teacher to many different ages in multiple churches. I have been a youth sports coach and scout leader and through all of these various roles I tried my best to use them as a method to bring glory to God and to further his kingdom. So all of my life even unto this very day I consider myself a loyal faithful Christian who seeks only the furthering of his kingdom.

 A Misfit’s Journey

All of that being said there is something else about me that is also important. You see I am a misfit to the very core. Like most every human being I have tried in various groups and in various ways to “fit in” and despite my best efforts I failed to do so. For me it began in my earliest years of school. There were many things about me that were different and given that most social groups including school children are somewhat Darwinistic in their values, I was not deemed as being one of the fittest worthy of survival. I tried many ways of overcoming my short comings mostly they all had one theme. I had to be “enough”. As a young man I loved athletics and so I felt that if I could be the best at my chosen sport that perhaps that would gain me acceptance and approval by my peers. I had my moments of triumph and lots of struggles but I managed to hang on to make the team and even start several years in multiple sports. So I had friends that were “Jocks” and was perhaps considered by some to be a “Jock” myself but there were many things about the Jock culture that I had no interest in so I never truly fit in and was considered by most in that clique to be an outsider and not truly one of them.

I also valued education and I tried really hard to get good grades which is not something in a small town Texas school that was valued by the vast majority of Jocks. I actually did quite well but there was always someone smarter and many of my really intelligent friends saw me and tried to label me as a dumb jock. So while I probably shared more in common with this group, I never really fit in there.

Next there were my Christian friends. When all else fails you should be able to “fit in” at church right? Wrong again. This is probably the rejection and the cut that is the deepest wound of all. While you would think that the whole cool kids thing and dividing people into groups like jocks, freaks, geeks etc. would have been left behind in high school what I have found in reality is that there are groups of 60 and 70 years olds in churches that are still dividing people up and assigning status to someone based on some standard they apply.

Misfit is Exiled

Here again I found myself as never being quite enough. Despite my efforts to work hard and serve I failed to make deep connection with the vast majority of Christians I encountered. Mostly because I wasn’t attractive enough, rich enough or cool enough. So what is someone like me who has a fierce love for God and an unshakable faith to do when he finds that he is not wanted in any church to which he has tried to belong? I’ll let you know when I figure that one out as I am still working on it. For now however I have to consider myself an Exiled Misfit. The term Exile is borrowed from David Kinnaman’s book You Lost Me. His description of an Exile reads like my autobiography. Basically it is someone who has a deep abiding faith in God but can’t seem to find a church that shares their same values.

Thank God I’m an Exiled Misfit!

At some point in the last year I had an Epiphany. It was then that I realized that being an Exiled Misfit was an act of grace and mercy and a tremendous blessing from God! I know you may think I am crazy and maybe even a bit cheesy but it’s true. If I had been accepted and “fit in” just like everyone else then I would be part of the problem propagating and furthering the social structures and social caste systems and social climbing that were never intended to be part of Christ’s church. Additionally there is a fundamental truth about God’s kingdom. He doesn’t use cool kids. Listen to what the apostle Paul says in I Corinthians 1:26-29

For consider your calling, brethren, that there were not many wise according to the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble; but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, and the base things of the world and the despised God has chosen, the things that are not, so that He may nullify the things that are, so that no man may boast before God

God Really Love’s Misfits!

I challenge you to find one of the great heroes of the faith that fit in or was considered cool. By contrast there are countless examples of “nobodys” that God used. For example who would use an 80 year old shepherd to become the great deliverer and law giver and leader of God’s people and yet God used Moses to do exactly that. How about the youngest son whom the father left tending the sheep when the prophet Samuel came to his house to anoint a new king and yet it was that young shepherd boy that God chose to be the next king. Who would hire a bunch of unschooled fishermen, tax collectors and zealots to be the ones to usher in a new religion and establish the church and yet that was exactly whom Jesus chose.

In Hebrews 11 there is a listing of some of the great heroes of the faith. The author pauses briefly and adds in the following observation in Hebrews 11:13-16

All these died in faith, without receiving the promises, but having seen them and having welcomed them from a distance, and having confessed that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. For those who say such things make it clear that they are seeking a country of their own. And indeed if they had been thinking of that country from which they went out, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God; for He has prepared a city for them.

Moving Forward with Hope as an Exiled Misfit

Once I realized this I chose to embrace the title of Exiled Misfit because that is how God’s people always have been and always will be. Further I promised myself whether inside a church or in the world to never again seek “the approval of men”. There is only one person whose approval I need and if scripture makes anything clear having his approval and having men’s approval is a mutually exclusive thing as the apostle Paul reminds us in Galatians 1:10

For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ.

As for the hopeful part, I have a great deal of hope. My hope however is not in churches or people or ministries or programs or anything of human origin. My hope is in God’s kingdom and my inheritance that he has promised me as his child.

I also hope to find other like-minded Christians who are not happy with the status quo of Christianity and the church of the 21^st century and find fellowship and encouragement as we seek to continue our work for God’s kingdom and to serve him and him only.